Tuesday, January 13, 2015



If you give your 1-year old your phone to entertain him while you steal that 8-minute shower you truly deserve, make no mistake: he WILL take naked pictures of you through the glass shower doors. 18 of them in fact. You will not know this because during that 8 minutes, he was not screaming, climbing into the sink or toilet, or throwing anything at you. So you, honestly, did not know (or care) what he was doing with your phone. Delete my apps? Whatever. Call Daddy at work? Sure.

Fast forward two days later. You will attempt (in vain) to entertain that same 1-year old through an hour-long gymnastics class for your daughter. The books you brought are of no value to him, and he tore through the snack in 45 seconds. So... there are 48 minutes left. Fine, here's my phone, you'll say.

He will pull up some of the stunning shots he took of you 2 days prior and proceed to show them to your 6-year old son who is sitting several rows away in the bleachers. Your 6-year old son will then shout (for all the other parents to hear), "Mom! There are like a bunch of naked pictures of you in your phone."

So now you know what will happen if you take a mid-day shower with your toddler in the room and let him have your phone. You've been warned.

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